Friday, January 3, 2014

One of My First Brain Sifts of 2014

Peeking into the lives of people who have lost one of their babies always blows my mind.  I kinda sorta follow a blog by a woman who lost her son.  It's called aninchofgray.blogspot.com. It crushes parts of my heart every time I read it.  It does put things in perspective.  So what that my Middle Guy leaves all of his clothes on the floor and never turns off the TV when he leaves a room? So what that he has a brilliant brain for funny and a little bit of everything but this is often not conveyed to his teachers because he leaves his homework under his bed?  So what that First Born and Middle Guy are complete opposites?  So what that First Born can't sleep until he's checked his backpack a couple times to make sure he has not forgotten anything?  And that First Born cannot stop harping on Middle Guy? So what that Twin A, oh hell, she is pretty much perfect.  So what that Twin B is the sassy one?  And she has ulcerative colitis; yes, SHIT!  OK, bad pun, but still.  She can be quite sick without medication.  But it won't kill her.  As long as we stay on it and she gets checked for cancer often once she is in her 30's.  So what that Husband forgets to ask how my sometimes-crushing depression is?   He knows it's there, and he is usually there for me and my gloom.  The asking shouldn't count as much as the doing.  Right? Right.  I am just an asker, so the nonaskers kinda piss me off sometimes, ya know?  Catholic-raised people with OCD are much better at updating each other on health issues; otherwise, guilt ensues.  Husband comes from a mutt Christian background, with a mom who sings, "Nothin' to it but to do it."  GAhhhhhh!  Positive mental attitudes are 2% attitude, I say.  Positive mental attitudes are genetic and involve a general obliviousness to world's major flaws.  Obliviousness is just not one of the tricks in my bag.  Reading and seeing tragedy around me strikes fear in my heart, 'cause it's only a matter of time before something like that happens to my family, according to my calculations. 
BUT!  BUT! BUT!  I can rejoice when my family is all home at night and my bed is warm and my belly full (too full, BTW).  
I should work on the friend thing, so your checking in on my blog was very much appreciated.  Yes, we should hang, chill, drink some wine, eat some chocolate or cake together.  Well, since we are cyberspace friends, we might have to settle on some words back and forth.  Back and forth words that heal our hearts and satisfy our brains and tickle our funny bones.
I hope your year is off to a great start.  Our year up here is fucking cold, but we'll deal.
So much more to catch up on, but I need to take my dogs out before the weather stops me.  It's my way of exercising and clearing my mind and my helper dog reminds me that I must do it.  My simple dog, not so much. hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com anyone? I love Allie Brosh and I love my dogs.  I don't know why, but burying my head in my dogs' furry bodies always makes me feel better.